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The Big Reveal

Most parents faced with the pain of a child coming out have very little knowledge of how to navigate it. As a result, they are likely to experience many years of struggle and frustration and could make mistakes that could cause life-altering harm to their child. The purpose of this book is to equip parents and church leaders with the attitudes, principles, and skills they need in order to love their LGBTQ+ child well while they discover the role their faith plays in this process.

The Story

Parents experience a wide range of emotions when their child comes out. They need to know how to process the pain, grief, confusion, and anxiety at a time when no one may feel safe to confide in. This book, based on one parent's personal journey, provides answers for anyone who wrestles with the confusion that emerges when their love for an LGBTQ+ individual feels at odds with their faith. Most literature available to help Christian parents speaks to homosexuality and other issues surrounding an individual's identification as LGBTQ+ from two main perspectives: affirming or non-affirming. There is very little content to help parents navigate this journey from the middle. With the church already haven taken sides on this topic, parents flounder as they are forced to confront in the flesh an issue that may have been only hypothetical in the past. Parents in this situation can make life-altering relational mistakes with their LGBTQ+ child if they are not equipped to lead with love for the individual while they educate themselves anew on the topic. 


Solution: If parents could receive some counsel from someone who has walked in their shoes, they could spare themselves and their LGBTQ+ child a tremendous amount of additional grief. Knowing more could also provide crucial context that could literally save their son or daughter’s faith in the process, and possibly even their life. Suicide rates for children who identify as gay are six times higher than their peers and eight times higher for transgender individuals, and parents can decrease their child's mental health issues by how they respond in the moment and after they come out. 


This book details the lessons the author has learned along the way about the key topics of faith, identity, relational safety, mental health, and demonstrative love as she walks with her youngest son, Noah, since he came out in high school. Like most parents, she was devastated, but her grief was compounded by the crisis of faith that followed. As she and her husband wondered whether they would have to choose between their faith and loving their child, they found a path they didn't expect. This book details how one family is navigating the journey that has allowed them to love their LGBTQ+ child well, hold onto their faith, and discover the purposes God has for them along the way. 

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